in the rubble
a sweet friend of mine reminded me yesterday of the power of visualizing prayer. i'm such a visual person and have spent too many months visualizing worst case scenarios or unrealistic and overly hopeful reconciliations post breakup. but, as i sat in quiet prayer with the lord, it all came to me. a clear vision of sitting in the rubble. like those images you see of horrible destruction after a hurricane. it's almost unfathomable and it isn't a mess you can just piece back together. and there i am. broken. defeated. just sitting amidst the rubble. not wanting to leave quite yet... thinking that if i just try hard enough, i might be able to take these broken pieces and find a way for them to all fit back together again. but they're shambles. broken, splintered, shattered. beyond repair. i have a hard time reconciling the fact that i just can't fix some things. i've been sitting there for so long. holding off the bulldozers as they come to clear it all away. not ...